Saturday, January 14, 2012

The women of my past

Yunno it's interesting to look back and think about just how much I have been used, abused, and taken advantage of by women in the past.. and even today I still see the damage left behind from previous relationships..

My first ever serious relationship delt me some hard emotional blows..
it taught me never to be stupid with sex hungry women, it killed my trust, for a women who would walk around behind my back and screw several other guys..
This same women was careless enough to crash my car into her house and never pay for the damages..
to this day all of my car's problems are attributed to the crash..
cooling problems, steering problems, leakage.. all sorts..

Yet today I still speak with her as a good friend..and follow her life from outside on the internet..

My Second ever drained me financially, and showed me just how dependent a person can be, and then just drop you in the blink of an eye the second she sees she can't get anymore out of you..
a liar and deceiving person who played the game before she finally realized she had enough..

The third showed me just how gullible and powerless I can be, and took everything I had of value, and there was nothing that could be done..

Now I know that all of the events in the past that led to my demise in these relationships could be in part my fault for not taking action.. or just plain stupid for going out so far and sticking my head out there only to have it kicked hard...

But I'm a nice guy.. and I based my life on being nice and loving every minute of it..

Which is kinda why I'm proud and relieved to have finally found a women who won't lie, or steal, or cheat..
she is every thing I need, and has proven to me that I'm the only thing she wants, in soo many ways..
its hard to think sometimes the trouble I went through just trying to live a stable life without being alone

and to realize that my answer was there all along.. sitting in a bedroom, watching me do all my stupid things
and supporting me in everything I did.. and then finally had her way when she got me to drive over and ask her out!
2 years later, and i could not be happier in a relationship... thank you so much Sila <3

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